"There will come a time when all of us are dead. All of us. There will come a time when there are no human beings remaining to remember that anyone ever existed or that our species ever did anything. There will be no one left to remember Aristotle or Cleopatra, let alone you. Everything that we did and built and wrote and thought and discovered will be forgotten and all of this will have been for naught. Maybe that time is coming soon and maybe it is millions of years away, but even if we survive the collapse of our sun, we will not survive forever. There was time before organisms experienced consciousness, and there will be time after. And if the inevitability of human oblivion worries you, I encourage you to ignore it. God knows that's what everyone else does."

 

Educating a Friend

Me: So, let's say that you're at school and you see a guy you know. I mean, you guys talk every once in a while and he's pretty cool, but you're not like friends or anything. You just talk to him every once in a while.

Guy Friend: What's his name?

Me: I don't know. Frank?

Guy Friend: No.

Me: Okay, fine. His name is Will. Okay?

Guy Friend: I don't think it really suits him, but okay.

Me: ...So anyway, you're at school during lunchtime and you see Will. So, you notice Will's not eating anything. That's when you realize that Will has no lunch, no money for lunch, and no way of getting either. He's just sitting there like he normally would. He's not acting any differently and he's not asking anyone for anything. Not money, not a fry, not even a salt packet, but you know he's gotta be hungry. So, what do you do?

Guy Friend: Do I have any money?

Me: Yeah. You have enough for you and another meal.

Guy Friend: Duh, I buy him lunch.

Me: Okay, cool. So, like you said, you buy him lunch. You buy your lunch and you buy his lunch and you go over and hand it to him. And, he says, "Wow. You know, that's really nice of you, but I wasn't gonna ask anyone for lunch. I was probably just gonna wait until I got home to eat." And, then you say--

Guy Friend: Nah, it's cool.

Me: Exactly. You say, "Nah, it's cool. I'm just being nice. It's a gift." And, Will says, "You know, that's awesome. You're really nice, bro." And, after that, you guys start hanging out. You guys are like really good buds. You are always hanging out and laughing and just having a good time. So, you guys are friends for a few months, and it's tons of fun. Then, one day, you go up to Will and you say, "Hey, Will, you know, I've been thinking, and I kinda want that five bucks."

Guy Friend: What five bucks?

Me: Hold on. I'm getting there. So, Will says, "What five bucks?" To which, you reply, "Well, we've been hanging out for a long time and it's been really fun, but like, I've done a lot of really nice things for you. Like, I'm always nice to you and I always listen and do things you wanna do, so I was thinking that because I've been so nice, you should pay me back that five bucks I spent to get your lunch right before we started really hanging out."

Guy Friend: What? Why would I--

Me: I'm not done yet. So, then Will looks kinda hurt and he says, "But I thought you were just being nice. I thought that was just a gift." So, you say, "Whether or not it was a gift, don't you think you kinda owe me that five bucks since I've been so nice to you?" And, Will says, "No. I don't think I owe you that!" And you get mad, so you say, "Well, I think that you do, so I think you're being really shitty and stuck up about this and I feel like I've been completely wronged."

Guy Friend: Oh, my God. That's so fucked up of me. I would never do that to Will. Will was nice. We were buds. That's way screwed.

Me: I know, right? Hey, just wondering, have you ever heard of this fictional place called "The Friendzone?"

Guy Friend: Well, yeah, but...

Guy Friend: ...

Guy Friend: ...

Guy Friend: oh

abtchance:

pinkandporcelain:

if we could all stop for a minute and see the depth in this, we’d all be one step closer to being a more understanding sort of people.

For a minute all I saw was the reflection and I was like hey that’s a cute dress but at least get him one in his size and then I realize the message is even deeper and I have so much respect for this.

abtchance:

pinkandporcelain:

if we could all stop for a minute and see the depth in this, we’d all be one step closer to being a more understanding sort of people.

For a minute all I saw was the reflection and I was like hey that’s a cute dress but at least get him one in his size and then I realize the message is even deeper and I have so much respect for this.

(Source: )

shylocks:

if english isn’t your first language but you think and dream in english and sometimes have to mentally translate from english to your first language when speaking it as a consequence of your consistent exposure to the internet clap your hands

darkbluetile:

thebrownskingirl:

You are so used to your features, you don’t know how beautiful you look to a stranger.

I can’t believe I’m even more beautiful than I think I am this is incredible where’s my modeling contract

orphanblack:

Oi, oi. It’s about bloody time for a new #AskOB, yeh?*

In honor of Maria Doyle Kennedy’s birthday (Sept 25th, same as Mr. Jordan Gavaris!), we’re releasing a brand new #AskOB later today!

Stay tuned, #CloneClub.

*Last time we attempt an accent. Promise.